Dallas — What’s your preferred pronoun? Are you asking for consent before grabbing? These were just two questions comedians posited to Thursday night’s crowd at the ninth annual Dallas Comedy Festival.
Rob Christensen’s preferred pronoun is “bro,” while Drew Lausch’s is a derogatory word for “gay." Lausch bounded on stage proclaiming himself as the “friendly ****** from Fargo, N.D.” in an attempt to repudiate the slur. So, it seems like fair use at this point, though it’s sure to be a trigger for someone. Thursday night’s stand-up sets at the Dallas Comedy House were full of triggers in the parlance of our times. But isn’t that what we expect from our comics? For it’s when they delve into hot topics of the day that they really make the audience laugh.
Christensen came out announcing he’s 37 and feels great about being half way done. He poked plenty of holes in himself and the culture at large throughout his set. A bit about going to bed feeling fine and waking up with a limp segued into a family history of gout, which he then spun into gold. After the Brooklyn-bred and LA-based comedian said gout, a few audience members responded with “eww.” And Christensen explained gout suffers from a disgusting name. In actuality, gout, which many suffer from due to excess consumption of meat and beer, is really just bad-ass American arthritis, according to Christensen. He proposed a rebranding as “Barbeque Limbs.” That way when someone sees him limping down the street, they’d think “… look at that boy, he can’t handle his brisket. Been in Texas two days and he’s walking around with BBQ limbs.”
Marc-Anthony Sinagoga explained the quandary a big man goes through when choosing a sit-down or standing-up shirt. If he chooses incorrectly he might end up sitting down and exposing his underbelly while the buttons diverge to create little “shirt vaginas.” The Canadian mentioned his been on a diet for two months and lost 60 days so far. He tore through his set at a rapid pace hilariously explaining problems Italian kids face like living with their parents who also live with their parents.
Catherine McCafferty claimed she’s bad at casual sex because she overanalyzes and overthinks potential dates. Not actual dates. Just the mere thought making plans for a date sends her into critical overdrive, planning everything she is going to say to this new beau who inadvertently said something wrong in front of McCafferty’s mother as if this already happened. She had another great bit about the anxiety of cutting her hair into bangs, wondering if her face shape supports a hairstyle that screams “I have an emotionally distant boyfriend.”
Lausch, who lives in New York, said it’s just so much fun being so gay and so blonde in the city. He shared a funny bit about a boyfriend getting pulled over and a Grindr falling out of the glovebox and the NYPD calling for back up for “two f*** and a pair of custom-made tap shoes.”
Three-fifths of Edmonton, Alberta-based Marv N Berry performed a hilarious sketch show Thursday night. Chris Borger, Nikki Hulowski and Mike Robertson ran through a number of scenes that included an audition for a weekend radio DJ that relied heavily on help from Jua Holt in the tech booth. Borger explained the need for the applicants to get freaky AF, and Hulowski and Robertson didn’t disappoint, pantomiming wheels of steel and mixing boards with Holt hitting every mark to make what can only be described as sounds. Hulowski’s “Roseanna,” at least I think that was her name, was coy AF yet raunchy as all get out at the same time and it was hilarious.
Later, Borger as “Gary” and Hulowski as “Deb” go a see therapist who specializes in conflict resolution because they want to learn how to bicker like a normal couple, like the couple on their favorite show “The King of Queens.”
Robertson’s therapist has them call each other a bitch and an asshole, which is hard at first but quickly devolves into a sort of foreplay that eventually has Deb atop Gary, who asking her to “baby bird me,” which looked exactly like you think it did.
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